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October 26, 2017
old rusty motel sign

Summer Vacations

The nice summer weather is making people want to take time off of work to enjoy the sun. So, it’s no surprise that people are taking vacations now. Vacations are expensive though, did you know the average price of a trip to the Caribbean for two people costs around $4,000! If you feel like you have to take a vacation then why not spend as little as possible, let’s say like $500. I know you are thinking, “Where the hell can I go for $500?” Well, I have an answer, the Crusty Cottage Motel. It has all the amenities you could want in a vacation, great rooms with stained sheets, rusty bathroom fixtures, sandpaper towels, and a huge 13” black and white TV. On top of the great rooms there is so much else to do there. Their pool is great, with green algae water that is good for your skin and a slide that is floating around in the pool, it’s awesome! Oh, and how could I forget the petting zoo they have there; they have snakes, cockroaches, spiders, rats, and even possums. If you have kids they will love playing with the animals. Last but not least, you have to eat at the Crusty Kitchen; their SPAM, mayonnaise, and cottage cheese casserole is outstanding. Needless to say this will be the best vacation you have ever had! If you don’t think this is the vacation for you then why not invest with Dollar Investment Club, and save up enough money for ten Caribbean vacations.
October 26, 2017
Lloyd & Mary - dumb & dumber movie

A Dumb(er) Man’s Game

Lloyd: “Not good, as in 1 in 100?” Mary: “I’d say more like 1 in a million” Lloyd: “So you’re saying there’s a chance?’ ‘Yeahhhh!” In reality, the chances of you winning the lottery is a mere 1 in 175 million. So, while yes, you can argue there is a chance…is there really? Millions of people, including Lloyd, believe they will be that one lucky winner. Really? Come on. GET A GRIP PEOPLE! You are more likely to have picked a perfect NCAA bracket, become an astronaut, find a four-leaf clover, or (unfortunately) be murdered than win last weekend’s Powerball payout. Now, I know we all want to believe that we can beat the odds; and trust me I have done it too. I’ll be that one girl sitting at the bar, counting out dollar bills to play just one game of quick draw. You know, “Just so I can be the one to buy the next round.” So, you sit patiently, pretending to engage in meaningless bar talk while you’re really staring at that small little TV out of the corner of your eye. The countdown begins and then “Shhhh quick draw is on!”…Um If I’m not mistaken I’m pretty sure there’s no sound when the numbers start to appear on the screen. But, for that one minute it’s as if your world is about to end if you don’t get those five stupid numbers to pop up on that screen. The first time you win, you’re always saying, “Why not? I’m on fire right now. I just won 100 pennies, just think of the endless possibilities.” But, as soon as you start winning, you start losing even more, until you lose just about everything. Then, after a couple of drinks, you get to that point during your night […]
October 26, 2017
pick up truck

Helpful Moving Tips

In the last couple of days I have been going through the overwhelming process of moving. While excitement and anticipation took over my body, I was also very anxious about how I was going to be able to afford my new apartment that not only needed to be furnished but also was over 120 miles away. As young adults, it is expected that we will move from one apartment to another until we move into that white picket fence house that we will forever call home (YIKES!). So, in order to prepare for your next move, here are a couple helpful hints. Do not pay over $100 to rent a moving truck. Instead, find a friend or even a friend of a friend who owns a pick-up truck. Chances are they have a little (if not a lot) of redneck blood in them and LIVE for this type of stuff. This also means that they are most likely men, so they can do all the heavy lifting while you just sit back and direct traffic. Furnishing your apartment does not mean you need to go to IKEA and buy everything in sight. Go to garage sales, pick up old furniture and then make it your own. A can of paint can go a long way and can help turn that dirty, old, should be on the side of the road dresser, into a work of art. Before you go and buy brand new dishes, pots, and pans go shopping in your parent’s house. Most likely, you have been living there since you graduated college, unable to get a job like most of America’s young adults, so you know what dishes get used within the household and which ones just collect dust. Take out those dirty dishes and immediately put them […]
October 26, 2017
boring movie date

Dreaded Date Nights

Hey dude, don’t worry, you’re not just the only one. Every guy has to reserve a night of the week for a “date night” with the lady friend. Yeah, we know, it’s the worst; and yes, we’d all rather be doing manly things like watching sports with the guys. But, it’s just one of those harsh realities of life. Date nights have to happen in order to keep peace on earth. We all know the easiest way out is to just head down to the movies to catch the latest chick flick. But, think about how much money you’re spending every week on something that is just absolutely zero fun. These dates already crush your man hood week in and week out, so don’t let them crush your wallet as well. Avoid this weekly routine of heading to the movies; and instead, put that money aside for something you planned on in the future, and NO I’m not talking about that one word that starts with a “c” and ends with “hildren”. I was thinking more along the lines of…oh, let’s just say, your future man-cave, for instance. So, by giving up that chick flick every week, you could end up with more than $95,000 in just 30 years! *(Investing $75 per month at 8% annualize return). Guess who’s going to be resting easy tonight while dreaming big about their future?..(cough, cough man-cave). The answer is…you! Yes, you, young man. You’re going to sleep well tonight. [photo: www.thefrisky.com]